my perfect cousin

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now i`ve got a cousin called kevin
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he`s sure to go to heaven
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always spotless clean and neat
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the smoothest you can get them
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he`s got a fur lined sheepskin jacket
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my ma said they cost a packet
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she won`t even let me explain
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that me and kevin are just not the same

chorus:
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oh my perfect cousin
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what i like to do he doesn`t
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he`s his family`s private joy
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his mother`s little golden boy

he`s gotta degree in economics
maths physics and bionics
he thinks that i`m a cabbage
cos` i hate university challenge
even at the age of ten
smart boy kevin was a smart boy then
he always beat me at subbuteo
cos` he flicked to kick and i didn`t know

chorus